A Class Proposition

I am a high school teacher, as I mentioned earlier in another blog. I happen to teach reading and English to a class where we are studying the different sounds of ea. Short e, Long e, and long a. I was going through a list of words asking them to put them in the right phonemic category. "Alright, whose got steak?"....."Long a"..... "Good... Where does lead (the metal) go?".... "short e"... "Good. Where does clean go?"... "long e"... "Good". We went through this for several words and when I finally got to the last word, not realizing what it was until I looked down, I said, "Whose gonna give me...." When I looked down and saw that the last word was "head", the next word that came out of my mouth was...."OH MY GOSH... UMMM......... What category does head go under." I was in terrible shock, a trainwreck in the classroom, at what I was about to do.... A few of the kids caught on after a moment of pondering the situation. They threatened to tell everyone what Mr. ###### said in class that day.

The cameraman and his ASSistant.

When I was a kid in high school, I never tried drugs and I still haven't for the record. But, I knew of people who always thought that there was nothing like a good acid trip. While there bodies were growing quite accustomed to taking this drug called acid, my body was beginning to try to get rid of acid in the form of acid reflux... Yummy.

It is a painful experience and nothing to get high on. As the years have gone by, I have taken the Nexium and Prevacid, I have gone in for an upper GI to find that I have a small but insignificant hernia that should not make much difference. A few years later, no change... especially in my diet, stress level, and my avoidance of regular medications, which seems to exacerbate things.... and I go back to the doctor. The doctor refers me to the specialist because upper GI's are outdated and they need to see what is going on down there and so he decides to refer me to the cameraman (Gastrointerologist) who is going to make a movie.

I hope for goodness sake that the movie he makes in my stomach resembles more of my work life than my home. At work, things stay fairly clean and busy but while at home, I let it all hang out. If what he finds in my stomach is like work, he will find lean chicken socializing with the low fat yogurt after a long day of teaching baby carrots about growing up. But, if the movie is like my house, the pizza is likely to be laying in bed making out with the Strawberry shortcake, both of which will be lying around without their topping of course. I hope that what is in my stomach is more like work than home. But, it is probably not the case seeing that what we eat really tells a lot about who we are. Wait, I feel a cliche' coming on.



But, the good news is.... As I looked at my price quote for the endoscopy, they also had a quote next to it for a colonoscopy just in case I had some anal issues (no comments from my wife accepted here). I was much relieved, after asking, that they use two different cameras. So, for the efficient cameraman (specialist) with a good ASSistant (pun obviously intended), we see that it could be possible to make two movies at once.

Though, I can figure what kind of movie would come from my gut,
I would hate to see the kind of movie that would come from my butt.

Making Music on a New York Gutter

This summer, my wife and I took a trip to New York City as part of our usual summer delights as teachers. It was her first trip and my second to the great city. I had first gone in 1997 while I was in college. When we were there, we looked at all the traditional sights as well as some of the aftermath of 9/11. We even got to eat a black and white cookie as made famous in an episode of Seinfeld. They were certainly delicious and almost like eating a piece of cake.

As part of the Grayline "hop on hop off" tour around the city we of course had to take a trip to Battery Park to gaze upon Lady Liberty. Rather than pay money though, we were content to take the free Staten Island Ferry which provides a gorgeous view and great photo opportunities. I must say that for some reason I like the photos I took during my first trip to NYC. I was right near her and took a picture up her dress. Unfortunately that was before the ease of technology and I cannot post it and it is too much of a hassle to scan at the moment. Besides, I would hate to find that I corrupted some young child by posting the statuesque booty on the internet. Nothing like a view of copper crotch for a young guy to stumble upon.

While we were at Battery park that day, recharging our Batteries, I took a walk down the white shell pavement over what appeared to be a drain. After I had taken five or more steps I realized that when I stepped on the drain, it let out a noise, much like a note from a xylophone. I stopped in my tracks and turned around, took five steps back, and stepped on the grate again to discover it contained a variety of different notes. Right there in the middle of the park was a musical device waiting for discovery. It was arranged into nine different squares and it was similar to the pattern used by many of today's "dancing" video games but without the electricity and bright colors. It was just a metal grate. As I put my feet on each square I discovered there were enough notes there to make a melody, a melody which naturally progressed into a tune from the highlands, while at the same time making the melody required me to dance and move my feet. So, there in Battery Park, between the water and the mammoth skyline, I made music. I made music in one of the most peaceful parts of the city, where people probably come both to escape from the hustle of life and the elevated threat of terror. It can be surprising where one can find music.

Another part of the story that cannot be left out. After taking five steps away and on my way back a lady in a business suit along with a well dressed man stopped to talk to me. She asked me how I liked discovering that musical device and I said that it was great. She replied to me that she designed it that way. While others wanted her to include signs pointing to the embedded xylophone, she felt that self discovery was the best option.

Remember when you come across people, like that gutter, they may look plain, but can make beautiful music if we take the time to go back and listen and participate. The best things in life are waiting to be discovered... cliche' but true.

Just Like Heaven.... Just like an apartment in San Francisco.

Once more, I have done one of those things that makes me proud to be a teacher. I made a long weekend where there wasn't one. While I would normally be asleep, I can set hear amidst the glow of my Mac (If my Mac is my baby would that make me a Mac daddy?) chatting with friends about all the gossip and chic flicks that I happen to get pulled into... In fact we guys can get pulled into a lot of stuff and are usually motivated by the fact that we get pulled by the thing we like to get pulled the most. Chic flick now and I get the chic later when we get home.

Right now, you are probably wondering what in the world it is I am referring too.... I saw a movie tonight when I would normally be sleeping next to my weary, wide awake, tired of all my nightly nasal noise pollution, wife... We were at the movies because we can sleep in tomorrow while our kids at school rope up their substitutes by the ankles and pull out the video games that they normally stash in their locker.... I think... Yeah. I would not know anything about how often they may sneak an occasional x box or play station to school. They fit nicely into the back pack. What makes things work well for them is the new PSP that they can fit in the pocket of their pants. What is a PSP anyway... Is it a new form of ESP.... What could it be? Is it the ability to see woman through their clothes? Porno Sensory Perception... like x-ray vision or something.... But there are no bones and innards to be dealt with as in your traditional form of xray.... Sony is pretty smart. Wait a minute. I got off track there. (For those of you who might not know, PSP is Playstation Portable and not some perverts dream toy though some teenagers would like that idea).

The movie I saw tonight was... Just like Heaven... Now I know that heaven looks like an apartment in San Francisco. Seriously. It was a good flick... The plot is unbelievable and full of inconsistencies (I always wondered how someone could walk through doors and not fall through floors) as would be expected in a fantasy of this kind. But, it will make one think about what it means to make life worth living. The acting will get you emotionally invested to a point that you think that what is going on is crucial and you will be very disappointed if this unbelievable plot does not work out. I even got welled up.... It was good writing and pretty good acting. No emmys, but worth the trip.

Pardon any spelling errors, I discovered that being new at this I don't know how to find the spell check... HELP ME.
Updated... Thanks to my friend Jim, I was able to work on titles. Thanks to "Girl on the Blog", I found the spell check button. Thanks to my wife I made things more clear. I just need to figure out how to make a blog a little shorter, precise, and punchy.... as I continue to add more and more and more to this one.

Wow.

I am now a resident of the web. Look out world... Maybe I will become famous with my musings.