When I was younger, the booby was the most mysterious object of my imagination. I was always able to look but not touch... unless it was by accident and really these following accounts were accidents. One time in high school, I was taking off my back pack and at a point that I had my arm outstretched to release my back pack, my fist met a unforeseen boob of some strange girl with her boyfriend. Oops. Another time, I was walking out of the band hall and called a friend of mine, who will be named Michelle to protect the innocent, and at the same time I called her I was reaching out my hand to tap her shoulder. She turned around at the wrong time. I guess I do not need to explain what happened next. Thank goodness, Michelle knew me enough to know that I would never do that on purpose.
But, the creme' de la creme' (sp?) came when I was in college. I was in Austin with my friend Jeff during my freshman year. We went to a great Mexican restaurant that was called Chuy's. We were with his dad who I had just met that weekend. While we were sitting down at a table. I was facing a wall. His dad said, "It does not look like they are that crowded." I said, "How do you know that?" He said, "Because there is not a long line of folks standing out there." "Out where?" I asked. "Oh, behind that wall." he said. A stood up to check behind the divider wall that was blocking my view and as I propped myself up at an angle to get a peek of the uncrowded lobby, I hit something hard with my head and remember thinking "what in the world just happened?" When I looked up, the nice waitress was grabbing her booby and shouted for all the restaurant to hear, "You Hurt My BOOB!"
I hid my face in my napkin until she took my drink order. When she asked my what I wanted, with a red face, I said...."Tea."
It was later agreed that if I had been clever enough at the moment, I would have ordered milk. It was five or so years later that I could touch them legitimately and not get a red face about it. I became a member of the boob club in 1999 at the age of 24 and I pledge that I will never turn back as long as we both shall live. Amen.
